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What is a Divorce Coach?

© 2023 Elinor Robin, PhD

Ending your marriage may be one of the most time-consuming, detail-driven, draining, and confusing things you ever do.

 

Your divorce can touch just about every aspect of your life – everything from your health insurance to your son’s 8th birthday party. Fortunately, getting divorced is something that most of us do only once. The down-side to this one-time reality is that without prior experience divorcing people often fall into upheaval as they enter the divorce industry’s multi-billion-dollar maze. In this tangled web husbands and wives find themselves at odds with someone who was once their closest ally. And the rules of engagement are secret and complex. Something is wrong with this picture!!

 

Divorces are like snowflakes, no two are alike. And because of the unique and multi-faceted nature of each divorce, it can be difficult to get the whole story. Attorneys are busy, and their focus on legalities often causes them to miss underlying motivations and hidden possibilities. Psychologists often don’t have the expertise to navigate through the financial intricacies that are a big part of the divorce process.  Family and friends lack the knowledge and objectivity to steer divorcing people in the right direction. And wading through the information, and misinformation, on the internet can become a full-time job for a divorce novice. Finally, there is someone to turn to! Your Divorce Coach.

Your Divorce Coach can guide you through it all.

 

Your Divorce Coach will help YOU:

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  • see the big picture and the hidden power dynamics

  • put together an interdisciplinary team of experts and advisors

  • create an easy-to-follow path through rough terrain

  • gather essential information

  • decide which divorce process is best for you

  • evaluate your day-to-day and long-term options

  • move through the process as smoothly as possible

  • avoid the mistakes divorcing people commonly make

  • use the cold hard facts about the financial and legal realities of divorce to achieve your best results

  • do the divorce math, get your finances in shape, and best spend your divorce dollars

  • hire and manage your lawyer

  • save your sanity

  • avoid sabotaging or jeopardizing your future

  • protect your children from divorce’s detrimental effects

  • avoid becoming a victim of divorce PTSD

  • achieve an emotionally and financially successful divorce

  • find your best outcomes for every facet (parenting, financial, legal strategy, etc.) of your divorce

  • explore your prospects

  • choose the right professionals, including retaining attorneys, mediators, and other experts 

  • define and refine your goals and the strategy you will use to reach them

  • organize your paperwork

  • access the documents, facts, and figures, you need

  • prevent costly mistakes

  • plan for rebuilding your life post-divorce, and move forward to a healthy and happy life. 

 

Your Divorce Coach can provide you with:

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  • a safe, private, and inexpensive place to vent

  • support so that you can keep your friends, family members, children, and new significant other (and their emotional baggage) out of the mix.

  • an objective, thinking brain, when your emotions get the best of you

  • tools

  • compassion

  • a vision for your life post-divorce 

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The legal process that divorcing spouses go through often adds insult to injury, amplifying the negativity of an already awful experience. This is true for the divorce initiator, who is often frustrated with the slow pace of the legal process, as well as the rejected partner (the “dumpee”) who is often caught off-guard when the divorce bomb drops.

 

Over the last decade there has been some significant buzz about the process of divorce coaching. Here are some recent examples:

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Ultimately, Divorce Coaches help their clients (1) evaluate day-to-day options and best outcomes regarding every aspect (parenting, financial, etc.) of their divorces, (2) explore their options for going through the divorce process including retaining attorneys, mediators, and/or other professionals, and (3) plan for rebuilding their lives post-divorce.

 

When looking for a divorce coach you want to make sure your coach is knowledgeable in all aspects of the divorce process. If you aren’t selective you could wind up with a divorce coach whose only experience is having been divorced. All of our Certified Divorce Coaches have undergone an extensive Divorce-Education program in addition to Basic Coach Training. They engage in on-going peer coaching and have opportunities to consult with other professionals so that they stay up-to-date on the latest trends and laws.

 

Talk to any of the Divorce Coaches listed on this site and find the right Coach for you. (Click Here To Find A Coach)

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